Dude!! Congratulations!!!
Seriously, coming out is never easy, and always cause for celebration. On a personal note: I too spent all my college years in the closet, and only just started to come out to my friends family this last year. This will be my first pride as well!
But pride can also be a little… how shall I say… “intimidating,” especially for those of us who spent most of their time in college studying, stressing, and wishing we were working out instead. Going to your first pride parade as a queer person is scary enough already. Couple that with the fact that every other guy looks like a Tom of Finland drawing and you have a recipe for more stress.
And what do we say to more stress? Absolutely fucking not.
So lay back, relax, and let’s give you a body you can be “proud” of, one that’s sure to get you loads of dick (and pussy!) in the coming pride festivities.
First, let’s clear up that skin. I doubt it has seen much daylight in the last four years. Oh honey, don’t be upset! You’ve been inside studying, who could blame you? But a great body starts with great skin, and trust me when I say you’re going to be showing a lot more of it once I’m finished.
You should begin to feel a soft tingling on your face, back, and chest. Every zit, boil and blemish vanishes without a trace, leaving you with skin clearer than a blue summer sky. Next, a warm wave washes over your entire body. It is as if your skin is absorbing days and days of direct sunlight in less than a minute, leaving you with a perfect tan—sans all those pesky tan lines. If you’re gonna march down main street wearing nothing but a jockstrap and a leather harness, you’ve gotta look as good without clothes as you do with them.
You’ve also gotta have some real “ass”-ets to show off, and sitting around in a classroom for so long hasn’t done your butt any favors. All that is about to change however, as you feel your hips gyrate to some alien rhythm, packing on pounds of fat and muscle with each primal thrust.
The first thing both girls and guys notice is a good ass. Now: you have a great one, the kind of ass destined to be pounded by hundreds of great dicks (and fapped to by many, many more).
And speaking of great dicks, flip over! You ass wasn’t the only thing to experience a growth spurt during that last round of changes. I’ve made sure to give you a cock that will show through every piece of clothing you wear. Get ready to be the talk of the town at pride… and the gym… and pretty much everywhere you go from now on.
Yeeeah… you ever heard the phrase “big dick problems?” Well, it’s a thing.
I wouldn’t worry too much though, since you’ll be getting laid every night for the rest of your life. XXL underwear, baggy sweat pants, and weird, horny looks from every other person you pass are all what I like to call “good problems” to have.
And last but certainly not least: muscles. My god, are you in for a treat. I’m about to turn you into the hottest, horniest, hugest fucker at pride 2021. You ready to grow? Like… really grow? Cus I don’t think you are. I’ve been told this is the most painful part of the transformation process...
… and the most pleasurable.
Fuck yeah, feel those muscles pulsate under that perfect skin, feel the years and years of intensive training hit you in matter of seconds. Feel the endless breaking down and building up of muscles fibers, all the pain and pleasure of a thousand workouts in the blink of an eye. You won’t be able to stop your hands from exploring your body, feeling it sculpt under your fingertips as if they were growing your muscles with each touch. You don’t want this feeling to end, and yet it does. As quick as it began.
Only now? You look like an adonis, the image of male perfection, the sum of every gay guy’s fantasy and every straight girl’s dream. Don’t believe me? Look for yourself. Snap a photo for christ’s sake; you’ll always remember this moment as the first time you saw your new body, the body of an out and proud bi man in his prime.
Now what are you waiting for? Get out there and strut your stuff, stud! This is your first pride after all, and I promise it’ll be one for the ages. I can’t think of a single girl or guy who won’t jump on the first opportunity to jump on you.
But I only deserve half the credit. Seriously! All I did was give you a body to match how beautiful and strong you are inside. Because coming out takes real strength, and that’s something no amount of muscle can ever lift.
Though the muscle is a nice touch, if I do say so myself.
Happy Pride!
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