Monday, August 31, 2020

Friday, August 14, 2020

My First TikTok

 


I was pretty much the last person in my middle school to get a facebook. Then in high school, I was pretty much the last person to get on Instagram.

Now, I feel like I’m the last person on earth to have a TikTok. What even is this stupid fucking app? I guess you just post videos of yourself doing stupid shit... but you can already do that on every other app. What makes this one so special?

Anyway, I figured I’d start out with one of those videos where it looks like you’re ripping your shirt off. I’ve been hitting the home gym pretty hard in lockdown, I might as well show off some of these gainz.

I’m assuming you just pull on the front your t-shirt, pause to actually take your shirt off, and then keep filming. When you cut it together, it’ll look like you’re ripping the clothes straight off of your body. Pretty sexy, if you ask me. I’ve seen about a hundred of these videos since I got thus dumb app. Seems easy enough... right?

Okay, I got my phone set up, put my home gym in the background to make it look like I work out (which I do!) I hit the little “+” button and... now what? Do I just press record? I guess so.

God, this is so dumb. Oh well; maybe some hot chick will watch this and DM me. That’d make it all worth it. 

Alright, here goes nothing! Just gonna give my shirt a little tug and—

ZOOOOOOOOOOOOOM

Oh my god... what the fuck is happening? Where am I? Why can’t I see anything?? Oh Jesus, what the hell is going on?! Is the app doing this??

Wait... what’s happening to my body? Oh god oh god oh god—dude I’m changing. I’m transforming. I can literally feel my body getting bigger, what the fuck?? This isn’t what my muscles feel like. I mean, I work out pretty often, but these are the muscles of a professional bodybuilder! God dude... I’M HUGE!

I gotta get out of here. I gotta figure out what the hell is going on. But... fuck man, it all feels so good. I can’t stop touching these muscles. Jesus, are those my pecs?? FUCK, I wish I could see them! 

Wait... oh god... something’s happening to my face. No dude, I can feel it changing. It’s like the bones are re-arranging themselves. OW! My nose literally shrunk! It’s like half as big! 

My god, what the fuck is going on? Now my whole face is itchy, like I’m growing a... beard? No way, it’s impossible to grow a full beard this fast. Then again, none of this should be possible...  

Wait—holy shit. You’re not gonna believe this; my ASS is growing. I’m holding it in my hands right now. It’s fucking spilling out of my fingers! This is insane. I’m turning into a gay guy’s fantasy: unrealistically large muscles, a lumberjack beard, and a dump truck ass. What’s next? A 10-inch cock??

Fuck, I shouldn’t have said that. Now my dick is growing like a fucking carnival balloon... IN MY FUCKING HAND!! Jesus, no girl is gonna wanna get fucked by a dick this huge. It feels like a giant cucumber! 

Then again, maybe I’m better off getting fucked. That’s why I hit glutes so hard; nothing turns a guy on like a thick, juicy muscle ass

What am I saying?! I’m not fucking gay! Oh god... my mind is changing too. I can feel it. New memories filling my head, new fantasies of getting ass fucked by other hot muscle guys. 

Christ, it’s turning me on. I feel so ashamed... but SO horny. There’s a tiny voice in the back of my head telling me this is all wrong, but it’s fighting my new animalistic urge to get plowed. Maybe if I just finger my ass a little... yeah, that’ll set me straight. Finger my ass and give this dick a little stroke...

Oh... oh my god... fuck that feels AMAZING! This body is incredible! Why am I fighting this?? This is the sexiest I’ve ever felt in my entire life!! 

God yeah, fuck that muscle ass. I’m so close... I’m so... FUUUUUUUCK!!!

ZOOOOOOOOOOOOOM

Hmmmm... nice. Just gonna show off these muscles a little bit, feel up these pecs. I wonder if the video actually worked, if it actually looks like I’m tearing my shirt off. Fuck, I could just tear my shirt off for real. It’s not like I haven’t done it before.

It really doesn’t matter; all I gotta do is post five seconds of me shirtless, and a bunch of thirsty gays are gonna flood my DM’s. This happened when I got Instagram too: I post one pic of my incredible ass, next thing I know I’m getting fucked by three of the hottest guys in town, one after the other.

TikTok shouldn’t be any different. I’ve seen so many sexy gay dudes on here already, and I’m sure all of them would love a taste of this beautiful body.

Hey, the video turned out pretty good! This is guaranteed to be a home run. All I gotta do is hit post, lube up, and watch the dick pics come pouring in.

God, I love the internet.