Ah yes, it’s always the decisions we didn’t make that sting most. You could have become a huge fitness freak in quarantine… you could have spent all this free time building your dream body… instead, you vegged, you over-ate, you watched TV for hours and hours on end.
Trust me, I can relate.
If only there were some way to turn back time, to rewind and return to those very first choices — the ones that really mattered — between reaching for that bag of chips or reaching for the protein shake, between hitting the “snooze” button on your 7 A.M. workout alarm or actually getting out of bed. If only you could change the past, then everything would be different now, wouldn’t it?
Oh hey, what’s that we’ve got here?
No, it’s not a sex toy! Get your mind out of the gutter. It’s a remote control, obviously!
Okay to be fair, this isn’t like any remote control you’ve ever seen. Because this remote doesn’t control your TV. It controls your whole life. Yes, just like that Adam Sandler movie, how astute of you.
So, say you wanted to go back to the start of quarantine and change your decision to work out at home. Let’s say… a couple hours every day? It’s not like you didn’t have the time. All I gotta do is change some settings here… tweak a couple presets… aaaaaand…
Voila!
WOW. That’s a lot of progress for just under one year! Turns out only a couple hours of home workouts every day is enough to make you look like a meat headed bodybuilder.
But it’s not enough to look like a meat headed bodybuilder; you want to become one. And speaking of “meat,” how was your diet over the last eleven months? Not very good I assume. Yes, that would explain why you look so bulky.
How about we go back to the beginning once more? Start a brand new set of eating habits, shall we? Keep that calorie count nice and high, but swap out all those fatty potato chips for some nice, hearty protein… sound good?
Good.
Yes, those are real abs appearing on your torso as we speak. Yes, you can touch them; they’re yours! This whole body is yours, so you better take care of it. I don’t wanna have to break out this remote again in another year. You’ve got no excuses now.
Besides, nothing beats the satisfaction of showing off at the gym, pumping those rock hard pecs in full view of all the guys you’ve envied for so long. Trust me when I say you’ll be the one getting jealous looks from now on… and lustful looks… a LOT of lustful looks…
Needless to say, I think you’ll have plenty of motivation to keep this body in shape.
Have a nice week!
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